Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Letting Go of the Need for Others’ Praise

“From self alone, expect applause.” –Marion L. Burton

The above quote really resonates with me.  It is impossible to recount the times I’ve expected (from others) praise, gratitude and acknowledgment throughout my life; only to feel disappointed when it didn’t arrive.  More recently, I’ve sought to shed such expectations.  In doing so, I am discovering applause is as close as my own fingertips—accessible to me any place, any time.  When in need, I only have to lavish it upon myself.

Author Don Miguel Ruiz wrote a book that has begun to change the way I think and react to virtually most every situation encountered.  It’s entitled, “The Four Agreements.”  One of those agreements is: “Don’t Take Anything Personally.”  Ruiz says, “When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”  Another of Ruiz's agreements is: "Always Do Your Best.”

When I look at both of these agreements in relation to expecting others to react to or acknowledge me in a certain way, all becomes so much clearer!  That’s because I’m learning to realize that my own applause is the praise that truly matters.  And, second, when I am doing my best (and I acknowledge it), no other form of “atta girl!” is needed (since I know in my heart that I’ve done my best!).

What about you?  Is this issue one you struggle with as well?  I’d love to hear your thoughts!  T.