Tuesday, October 2, 2012

On Big Stress Stuff…

“We don’t see things as they are.  We see them as we are.” –Anais Nin

Ever watch the movie What Lies Beneath?  It’s a favorite of mine—especially at this time of the year as it has that October-like spookiness to it.  There’s a point in the film where the lead character (played by Michelle Pfeiffer) is conveying, to a friend, all the life-changing occurrences that have recently taken place in her life.  Her friend nods her head in understanding, pats her on the shoulder and notes, “Big stress stuff, huh?”

Right now, I can totally relate.  For those who frequently read this blog, you are aware that our youngest son Patrick graduated from college in August.  A few weeks later, we packed him up and moved him many miles away--to Boston for graduate school.  Despite our happiness for him, and pride for his accomplishments, it has been bittersweet.  Without a doubt, it is a major life event. 

Last week, my sweet sister-in-law suffered a massive stroke.  Unfortunately, her recovery has not progressed as well as hoped (Your continued prayers, healing thoughts, dedicated intentions, etc. are sought and so very much appreciated.).  Last weekend, one of my uncles also suffered a stroke.  Thankfully, he appears to be on the road to recovery.  Yet, sadly enough, also last weekend, we received word that another uncle of mine, whose health had been poor, but not critical, passed away somewhat unexpectedly.  More major life events—certainly, these are all of the unpleasant variety.  I have struggled to find any redeeming quality to any of these sad situations; all of which occurred in the course of a few days.  

What I haven’t told you, yet, is that my oldest son Andrew is marrying the love of his life, lively, beautiful Amanda, in less than two weeks from now.  They have dated for about six years now, have been engaged for a bit over a year, and this is a joyous occasion we look forward to celebrating with all our hearts and souls.  Sure, it’s yet another major life event.  This time, it is the sweetest sort, however. 

Although I know it will take dedicated mindfulness on my part, I’m vowing to shift my energies toward positive thoughts during these trying times.  Yes, it is a time of worry and mourning. And, I do have to honor that to some degree.  However, it is also a time of celebration, pride and happiness. I am short-cheating myself if this isn’t given its due as well. 

Sometimes, it is easiest to fixate on the scary stuff, the negative stressors and loss.  That’s where a desired change in perception comes in. Although I can’t ignore my sadness or any of the other not-so-pleasant feelings, I must remember there’s so very much goodness that deserves equal recognition—big stress stuff or not. 

Love and peace.  T.